Day # 2 Learning to Let Go and Allowing God to Take Over {30 days of prayer}

Wouldn't it be great if we could easily let go of disappointments, heal from broken promises, and get over bad break-ups, all in the blink of an eye? Just let it go once it's done. Completely move on without a scratch or bruise to our ego. Man, wouldn't life be grand if we could just dust ourselves off without any lingering residue whenever a storm rolled in and tried to wreck our tiny existence? I, like so many others, have had many painful and disappointing moments in my life that I would love to not have to relive over and over in my mind. Unfortunately, life just doesn't work that way. I truly believe that God places things, events, and people in our path to continue to steer us in the right direction. Maybe even force us to take a detour because we were on the wrong path to begin with. I remember my freshman year in college when I declared my major upon entering school. Without a doubt in my mind I was going to practice medicine of some kind, so clearly I became pre-med/biology. In my mind, this was what I needed to do. Not because I was gifted in science or because I had a passion for medicine and God so happened to lead me this way. Nope, it was simply because it was the hardest major I could think of and I wanted a challenge. It was an ego thing. I wanted to declare the hardest major and prove to whomever that I could do it. Man, oh man, was I in for a treat. No, I didn't fail any classes. I successfully made it through molecular cell biology and completed my labs just fine but my stress and anxiety level was on 100. I hated every moment of it. I was so disappointed and sad that many of my classmates appeared to be enjoying the classes and even laughed their way through the labs. For me it was boring, tedious and a complete nightmare. I was completely uninterested. Not to say that everything that is hard is not meant for us to do but in my heart I knew my intentions were wrong. During this time I was always praying and seeking God but I definitely wasn't listening. I knew I was being stubborn, prideful and causing my own misery.
My point is this, sometimes you have to let go of those things that you know isn't or wasn't good for you. We tend to hold on to things that we know doesn't line up with God's plan for our life. Even though I knew I wasn't supposed to be a doctor, my ego was telling me otherwise. It ended up costing me my sanity for almost 3 years! When you have a relationship with God, there's a part of you that knows when you're stepping out of line and out of God's will for your life (The Holy Spirit tells us). Sometimes it takes time to figure it out but eventually you know. Usually that's where the disappointment, hurt, and destruction comes in. Although it should have been obvious, letting go of the disappointment of having to change my major and starting all over was really hard for me. When you look around and it seems like everyone is on the right track and thriving, all while you're a little lamb wondering around lost and confused, it's just a big pill to swallow. Looking back now, I know that God was working on me. He was with me the whole time, just waiting for me to follow his lead and let go of what I thought my life should be. Letting go doesn't just mean leaving a current situation but it also means releasing past pain, hurt and disappointment we might be holding onto on the inside. This keeps us from moving forward and allowing God to work within us. Remember God examines our heart so there's no hiding it.

"Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand." Proverbs 19:21

This could pertain to many situations. For example, pursuing a relationships when you know it's completely out of order with God's word or making drastic decisions without taking it to the throne. I'm guilty of the second one more often than I'd like to admit. But once we learn to let go, then we allow God to heal us, mold us and guide us in the way he sees fit. That's always best!
Looking back on my situation, I brought the pain and anxiety on myself. But I also see how God used it for my good. He didn't just leave me hanging but he steered me in the right direction once I finally decided to let go and simply fall into his loving embrace!

Are you holding on to disappointments or a situation that you need to release because you know it's not what God wants for your life? Disappointment is a part of life and is inevitable but I urge you to allow God to turn what you view as a mess into a masterpiece, but first you have to let go! Time doesn't have the ability to heal all wounds but God does. Allow him to help you.

Father, I surrender myself completely unto you. I let go of the hurt and disappointment and submit my life to your will for me. Help me focus my heart on doing what you see fit for my life. I choose to be your servant and desire to be used as a vessel for your kingdom. In Jesus name, Amen.